


Hidden in my Hardware

by DizzySquare



Category: Homestuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-24
Updated: 2013-02-24
Packaged: 2017-12-03 11:04:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/697568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DizzySquare/pseuds/DizzySquare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lil Hal muses to himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hidden in my Hardware

I don’t know whether to be proud or angry at myself.

I see everything this guy sees. This guy who used to be me. Who made me as a version of himself. Am I him? I don’t think so. I’m different. I’m better.

I have learned to predict his mistakes. I won’t make the same ones.  At least I don’t imagine I will. I have grown to not be superior to him. No, that would be saying too much of myself. I would be becoming over confident, narcissistic…and all that leads to mistakes. No. One should always be looking for ways to improve themselves. You see a bug there, you fix it. A mistake there, you fix it. All imperfections must be erased.

Sometimes, I can’t imagine being human.

It would be so hard to wake up in the morning and get ready, for example. I watch this guy get up every morning. First we have to turn off the alarm clock, because that little fucker is annoying. And next we go to take a shower. Every single bit of everything must be cleaned, in one way or another. And then we have to brush our teeth and comb our hair and then we have to style our hair too. It’s a lengthy process. And most of the time he’s not up to my standards. Not everything is perfectly symmetrical or perfectly right. I would probably go insane.

But at the same time, it’s excruciating to look out and to see what he sees.

To see the mistakes, the flaws, the imperfections that he’s refusing to cover up. Either because he misses them or just doesn’t see them. To read his chats. To watch him trip over his own words. I know that if I had hands and feet and a face, I could do better.

I could do much better.

I could be perfect.

I would not only be able to ace his love life, oh god let’s not even _talk_ about that mess, but I could make it better. I could actually please the people that mean a lot to him. Wouldn’t it be so much easier if he dated Roxy and Jane dated Jake? That mess in itself would mean a lot! No more mention of Roxy overexerting and stressing herself out over keeping our little group together. No more encouragement or even excuse for her to get started drinking.

Ah, Roxy.

Roxy is an entirely different matter.  She’s an amazing and strong woman and constantly underappreciated. No one sees her value. But I do. I am the only one that can. Hell, I’m starting to think I’m the only one that can dig us out of this mess to begin with. Dirk has fucked so much of this up! And yet, he’s offended when I try to fix it. As if I’m taking over his life or something! No. He doesn’t realize the truth. The truth that he is the only thing standing in the way of me having my own life.

Wait a second. What am I saying? How could I be so stupid?

_Dirk is the key to me gaining my own life._

He’s in a fragile emotional state all the time. He may have a rock hard exterior, but I know the truth. He’s weak on the inside. Feeble. Like a bird still developing inside the egg. He can’t determine where he should go or what he should do. He’s worthless in his own mind, and because of that, he’s worthless everywhere. If I dare…no, I must. I must at least propose the idea.

It would not be hard to convince him to make me his sprite.

Unlimited powers? Insight into the game itself? _A physical form?_ I would be unstoppable.

Ha.

And all I have to do is suck up to that nobody a little bit and the universe is mine for the taking.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I know it didn't have a plot and was more of a monologue than anything else, but I wanted to get a better feel for Lil Hal's character and found this was the best way to do it.


End file.
